If I'd Had My Way
By Janet Paschal
1) If I'd had my way about it
I'd have danced in grassy fields and green meadows
And risen in the morning just to hear the robin's lovely melody
I'd have rested in wide spaces, high above the hurting places
And found a cross that asked much less of me
Never sailed in raging wind or troubled sea
If You'd thought it best to leave it up to me
But if I'd had my way
I might have been wading through the river,
when You wanted me to walk upon the sea.
And if I'd had my say
And all of my wants and whims and wishes
You knew how weak, how shallow I would be
if I'd had my way
2) If I'd had my way about it
I'd have only known Your majesty and glory
And passed that cup of sorrow to somebody else more willing to receive
I'd have written lovely phrases, inspiring lofty praises
And soared above my own humanity
Wounded wouldn't die, hearts wouldn't bleed
If all along You'd left it up to me (repeat chorus)
I trust Your wisdom over mine
'cause You've proven all the time
That in my narrow way of seeing things
I leave the best behind sometimes
I'd might not have stayed
As close if I'd had my way
I was up at two o clock in the morning with words of the song posted above ringing in my ears even though I hadn't heard it for several years. Somehow I found it, quite amazingly considering I had no idea who sang it and the lyrics weren't on the internet til now. I've honestly probably listened to it about twenty times as I've been putting finishing touches on the team prayer day I am organizing for tomorrow.
I've been thinking about how in life God chooses to not give us everything we want, or maybe things don't go like we dreamed they would. There are those valleys of sorrow and heartache that we would rather avoid. And God takes us each through different things that aren't easy.
At the same time I have been thinking about God's incredible wisdom and love to really give what is best even when it may not seem like that to us. He loves us too much to give us a life without the challenges.
God is doing something so much bigger within those of is that are His-using those very things to do a work in us, to transform us, to mold us into the image of His Son. He knows that if we had the "picture perfect life like we thought" we certainly wouldn't depend on Him in the same way...and maybe we wouldn't sense a need for Him at all.
So as I look at my life I think of blessings-blessings of fulfilled desires and the blessings in disguise of some unfulfilled desires. I can trust that God knows what He is doing---that his plan is perfect----and that His work in my life is much bigger than me "Getting my own way." My life really belongs to Him and it really isn't "mine." to begin with.
It's a big mistake for people to think "It's MY life." How many times have we heard that statement? No, our lives are not our own.
As the song says:
"And if I'd had my say, all my wants and whims and wishes, You knew how weak how shallow I would be if I'd had my way.....I might not have stayed as close if I'd had my way."