Greetings to everyone,
If you have not yet read my previous post, "a Change of heart and a willful consent to being loved" I strongly encourage you to do so BEFORE reading this one-It explains some things.
I just have a few things to add......
Yesterday I went to a conference hosted by the House Of Hope called, "God Is, Don't Let go" It was really amazing and went too fast. It was a very precious time for me. I was able to give my testimony to a few random people as I walked around. I just could not keep it inside. I just don't care who knows!!! I am HIS FOREVER AND I KNOW IT!!!!!! It was so neat because a month earlier I had gone to a small Mothers and Others event with the House of Hope and everything that Lenchen spoke about just went over my head and would not go in at all. But this event was different--It was a six hour event and I felt like it went by in three hours amd was not bored or tired of it for a moment!!!!!!
And then this afternoon, I picked up my Bible and began to read and I just couldn't stop reading and I was just being led to go to all of these different places and Scriptures were connecting all over the place in my mind and stuff and it was soo amazing. I just felt soooo like STARVED for it. LET ME SAY FOR THE RECORD, PLEASE, THAT THIS HAS NEVER HAPPENED TO ME BEFORE!!!!!! Not like THIS!!!!!
And then somewhere in between reading Scripture, I pulled out a card that I had been given that shows the contrasts between PROUD AND BROKEN PEOPLE. It was from a Bible Study that we had done at Church this Spring by Nancy Leigh DeMoss called Brokeness, Surrender Holiness (or something like that) Anyways going to the Bible study was kind of one of those going through the motions things honestly for me, but I knew that being there was a good thing and God was using it even though I didn't realize it. So anyways, about two weeks ago I had sat in Lenchen's office and showed her the card and told her that I was totally on the pride side. I could check every one of the things listed that signified pride and maybe one on the broken side.
But today I looked at the card again. And instead of being drawn to the pride side of it, my eyes fell on the broken side of it, and I realized that every single one of those things had become a reality (not that I have arrived or anything) in my life at some point over the last two weeks. God has indeeed humbled and broken me and HE has CHANGED MY HEART!!!!!! It's the REAL DEAL guys!!!! It has all been HIS work!
HE SAVED ME!! HE SAVED ME!!!! HE SAVED ME!!! AND THAT IS WHAT I KNOW!!!! I AM HIS FOREVER!!!!!!!