So I am thinking about Mexico and my life here in the States at the same time..
I am so totally excited for conference!!!!!! I can't wait to see everyone and talk and talk and just share all that God is doing...and work alongside them a little...I have a feeling it will be a little hard to get on the plane to go back to the States on August 23rd (sigh) but, even as much as I would probably want to stay, I KNOW It isn't God;s timing quite yet. There are things that I am still working through here, a little more spiritual growth needed, and a few other issues to figure out. But hey, why think about the 23rd of August when it is only the 2nd? That day isn't here yet! And besides, IT WILL BE FUN COMING BACK AND TELLING EVERYONE ABOUT HOW CONFERENCE AND EVERYTHING ELSE WENT-----another chance to testify of God's goodness and faithfulness!!!!
I love Mexico--I really do love the people.....it's the truth......I can't imagine doing anything but serving God with my life, whatever He has prepared for me in advance to do. And going back as a Believer is going to be so different--I mean, I just see everything differently. Already I am relating to my team via skype and e-mail so much better than we ever did before....the issue was mine...not theirs. So I am grateful for Mexico, for my team there, and for the privilege of being able to serve there......my heart is set for return at the right time.
But I also love the other part of my life, which right now is here in the States volunteering at the Medical Clinic (I love medical ministry although I am not a nurse or anything like that.) I love being at the clinic and taking appointments and most of the time discovering that we have exactly the right number of slots for the people that need to be seen that Tuesday or Thursday evening. I love working with my transitioning supervisor, Andi, and my new supervisor, Sharon!!!--I am learning so much from BOTH of them, and volunteering there is really helping me with some valid needs right now in my life as well. God INDEED has placed me there, and I want to "be there" serving the Lord wholeheartedly.
Regarding my life in the States, I also love the freedom to receive mentoring right now, to work through things and see God healing my life, to grow spiritually, and to have the time to blog my thoughts, whereas in another chapter of life, I might not always have so much time to do so. Don't worry, I don't see myself ever giving up writing like this----our Savior is just too WONDERFUL!!!!
Right now in the States, I love the chance to be with my church family and hang out together and talk and grow together. They also, like my team in Mexico, are part of the Body of Christ. They want what is best for me....I love them and I cherish our time together. I treasure the fact that I was able to have more time with my parents and some excellent conversations with my mom about everything and anything before they set out to become full-time volunteers and RV'ers. I treasure the fact that I was here to go through the process of watching my childhood home get sold.....(Okay, that still brings a tear or two to my eyes.) I am truly thankful to be here...I love it here too, surrounded, once again, by precious brothers and sisters in Christ.
And still, honestly, it is that whole thing of living in two different cultures, where neither one fully grasps that of the other, (And I don't fully grasp either one, nor should I, because both have things that are not good and right, and added to that, I AM NOT Of THIS WORLD---MY CITIZENSHIP IS INDEED CLEARLY IN HEAVEN!!!) There are some things that are difficult or maybe even can't quite be accurately shared across both of them. There are "losses" (if you want to call it that) and many many gains in each place..and a different way of seeing many things in both places.
It is the life of a missionary........and I love it....and I am grateful...DEEPLY TRULY GRATEFUL FOR BEING GIVEN SUCH A PRIVILEGE AND HONOR......and may the Lord continue to give me a thankful heart..whether I am in Mexico OR here in the States, because the best part is that He is NOT a God confined to one location over the other......He is FULLY IN CONTROL AND OVER ALL OF IT...and WORKING SIMILTANEOUSLY IN BOTH PLACES (NOT TO MENTION-----ALL OVER THE WORLD) AT THE SAME TIME!!! Isn't that AWESOME!!!
So maybe it is somewhat natural to miss one or the other when I am not physically present in that place. I guess I have to continually remind myself to ENJOY THIS DAY wherever I am RIGHT NOW-and seek to obey God here and now-because, yes, HE IS using my life here, and maybe even there, in ways I do not know---and our God is oh, so very good because---NOTHING IS WASTED---NOT ONE MOMENT OR SECOND OF IT,-and today is God's gift to me, whereas tomorrow may come in Heaven for me, but not here on earth.
So use me Lord, today, if it be your will, to BRING YOU MUCH GLORY....and thank you for being a God who works in all places of the world at the same time----WONDERFULLY OMNIPRESENT. It is an INCREDIBLE attribute of God!!!!